


I Saw Papa Kissing Santa Claus

by IncandescentAntelope



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Character's Name Spelled as Viktor, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, First Christmas, Fluff, M/M, POV Makkachin (Yuri!!! on Ice), this is based on a joke my husband made and oops now it's a fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-07 19:19:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16859842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IncandescentAntelope/pseuds/IncandescentAntelope
Summary: Makkachin’s first Christmas doesn’t go as planned; she doesn’t know what’s going on. But Papa definitely just kissed Santa.





	I Saw Papa Kissing Santa Claus

**Author's Note:**

> **Author’s Note**  
>  This fic is written entirely from the perspective of a dog, so various things and people have different names. Makkachin is an incredibly intelligent dog, as all poodles are, and is trained with Russian commands, so she understands basic words and phrases in Russian, but doesn’t understand English. Dialogue marked by brackets and italics is English, while regular font should be interpreted as Russian. Obviously Makkachin cannot speak. She’s doing her best to talk to her people with adorable doggo noises. Suspend your disbelief. lol.

There's a tree in the house, but I can't touch it. Papa said so.

I've never seen a tree inside the house before. Just the little ones that Papa brings home after he's gone for a long time. And those aren't trees either. So what is this?

“Can I bite it?” I ask and lick the pokey part, it tastes bad. Real trees don't taste like that.

“No, Makkachin. Not for eating. It's not real,” Papa says. “It's just a pretend tree. See the lights?” Papa points at the bright spots on the tree. Real trees don't have bright spots. And real trees smell nice. This tree smells like a toy. But not a good one. 

“It's gross, Papa.” I say, and Papa laughs and pats my head. 

“The lights are very pretty, you're right, sweetheart! Makkachin’s so smart! Yes she is!” Papa says and he snuggles me under the Pretend Tree. Papa doesn't know what I'm saying. That's okay. I kiss his face anyway. He's my person. And I like him.

___________________

Papa told me I can't sleep in his bed anymore. I have a brand new bed all for myself now, but I still don't like it as much as sleeping with Papa. There are a bunch of big boxes everywhere and Papa's Friend has been here a lot lately. I like Papa's Friend. I met him at the Steamed Bun Place. He gives good cuddles and he knows where to scratch when my ears get itchy. (And he gives me lots of snacks, but don't tell Papa.)

“I'm sorry, girl, but Yuuri is going to live with us! And all three of us can't sleep in the same bed. We won't fit.”

“But Papa! Snuggles!” I say, very sadly. Papa gives me big hugs when I act sad. “Who is Yuuri? Why is he coming to live here?” I hear the door open, and it's Papa's Friend! He's carrying more boxes.

“[ _Viktor? I'm home! Hi Makkachin! Um, I mean-_ ] Hi, Makkachin!” Papa's Friend says.

“Hi!” I say back. I jump up to give him hugs and kiss his face. I've seen Papa do it before. It makes Papa laugh. Papa's Friend laughs too. I like when he laughs.

“Down, silly pup. Don't knock Yuuri over!” Papa says. 

“This is Yuuri?” I ask, flopping my head over like Papa does.

[“ _Can I come live with you, Makkachin? Will that be okay?_ ”] Papa's Friend asks, but I don't know what he says. He doesn't know how to talk to me yet. I look at Papa and Papa tells me what he said.

“Can Yuuri live with us, sweetheart?”

“Yes!” I say and kiss him some more.

“Makkachin, meet your other Papa!” Papa says, and he looks happy. It’s been a long time since he’s been this happy. And if Papa is happy… I can sleep in my own bed.

___________________

There are boxes under the Pretend Tree. With shiny stuff on them. And stringy stuff wrapped around them that's fun to pull on. It tastes bad, though. Not yummy like treats.

“Makkachin! No!” Other Papa yells, and I stop. Papa has been teaching him how to talk to me.

“Sorry, Other Papa.” I say very cutely. He likes it when I'm cute after I get in trouble. Other Papa gives me pets and belly scratches. 

“Good girl. So smart.” Other Papa says, he's not very good at talking to me yet. But that's okay. I like him even if he can't talk to me. He smells like Papa. 

“Where is Papa?” I ask, sadly. He went outside and didn't come back. Other Papa and I slept in bed together without him last night.

[“ _I miss him too. Viktor will be home soon._ ”] Other Papa says, and I don't know what he's saying, but he sounds sad. So I put my head on his leg and we sit by the Pretend Tree. Other Papa cuddles with me and we watch the Picture Box together.

Other Papa gets sad a lot. Especially when Papa is gone. So I do my best and give lots of cuddles and kisses to make him happy again. He makes my Papa very happy, so I don't like when he's sad. We lay down on the couch and cuddle for a long time until Other Papa stops being sad. 

“Makkachin want… treat?” Other Papa asks when he gets up, and I understand him! 

“Yes!” I say. I run to the kitchen and wait on my spot, where Papa taught me to sit. Other Papa laughs and holds a treat in his hand for me. He's happy. I'm doing a good job. Papa told me it's my job to watch Other Papa while he's away.

“Makkachin, sit.” Other Papa says, and I obey. “Good girl. Makkachin, down.” Other Papa says, and I obey, I lay down on the floor and wait. “Good girl. Makkachin, speak.” Other Papa says. 

“I love you!” I say, and Other Papa smiles. 

“Good girl. Good Makkachin. Catch!” He says, and he tosses the treat. This is my final trick! I leap into the air and catch the treat in my mouth! Other Papa claps and laughs, I'm doing a good job again. 

“Wow, good girl, Makkachin! [ _Makkachin takes the gold!_ ]” Other Papa takes one of Papa's shines off the wall and puts it on me like a collar. I'm not supposed to touch these. Other Papa takes a picture of me with his small Picture Box, and we cuddle under the Pretend Tree.

The boxes here smell like Papa. And Other Papa too. I decide these are probably their things, so I'll watch them, just in case.

___________________

There's a Warm Box by the Pretend Tree now. Papa brought it home. It's bright, but not like the Picture Box. It doesn't have pictures or people on it. It's warm like Papa's hugs, like walks in the park. I can't get too close, or I get too warm. (Or Papa will tell me 'no'.) I like sleeping there. And so do Papa and Other Papa.

[“ _Isn't the fireplace nice, Yuuri?_ ”]

“[ _Mhmm. Very nice, Vitya. Thank you for the early gift. Do you like it, Makkachin?_ ] Is this nice?” Other Papa asks me, and I say 'Yes!’ very loudly. But not too loud. Papa has already scolded me for being too loud today. But in my defense, the man in the rolling box brought more smaller boxes today. I was excited! I wanted to say hi!

“[ _Wow, Yuuri! Learning so fast! Translate this for me._ ] ‘Ya lyublyu tebya’.” I know that one too. Papa used to only say that to me. Now he says it to Other Papa too. Other Papa makes him really happy.

[“ _Vitya, that isn't even difficult! At least give me a hard one!_ ]”

[“ _Oh, I'll give you a hard one, Yuuuuuuuuuuri. Just you wait.”_ ] Other Papa laughs and Papa tackles him, and I jump in too! I like when we all play like this. But Papa sets me down and says 'no’, and they go play in their room without me. It happens a lot, but they always give me cuddles and hugs when they come back. 

So I watch the Picture Box and wait for them to come back. I'm a very good girl.

___________________

Papa and Other Papa invited friends over! All of my friends are here! There's Happy Friend! We look at his small Picture Box together and we take lots of pictures, like Papa does. And there's Angry Friend, who yells a lot at Papa and Other Papa. But he gives good cuddles, even if he smells like Cat. I don't like her. I met her once. She's mean. Angry Friend brought his friend. I haven't met him before.

I smell him, and he smells like Angry Friend. Maybe they're people together, like Papa and Other Papa. 

“Hi friend!” I say and he says hi back, and I understand him! He knows how to talk to me too!

“Makkachin, this is Beka. He's my... uh, my friend. He's cool.” Angry Friend says, and I jump on the couch right between them. I get head pats and belly rubs from Angry Friend and Cool Friend. I like them. Even if they smell like Cat.

Other Papa starts singing a song, and everyone else joins in but Papa. I start singing too! Loud and happy just like everybody else. Everyone laughs and Papa claps. I jump into his lap and give him kisses with Other Papa. 

“Happy birthday, Vitya.” Other Papa says, and I understood that. I agree and lick his face some more.

___________________

After everyone goes home, Papa and Other Papa and I cuddle on the couch. There’s a person wearing a fluffy hat talking to a weird-looking Me on the Picture Box. Weird Me has pokey things on his head. I don’t have those. People watch weird things.

“Makkachin, that's Santa!” Papa tells me, a new person to remember. He has fur on his face. I've never seen that before. Both Papa and Other Papa have naked people faces. No fur. 

I’ve never seen a Santa before. 

[“ _So this is Makkachin’s first Christmas?_ ”] Other Papa says, but I don’t understand him. Sometimes he and Papa talk in this weird other way that I don’t know. I just keep watching Santa on the Picture Box. 

[ _"Yes. We haven’t celebrated Christmas before. We haven't really had a reason to until now. I think she’ll like all the presents tomorrow morning._ "] 

[“ _I think she might be more interested in the paper than the t- the presents._ ”]

[“ _Yuuri, she doesn’t understand English, you can say ‘toy’. But if you say the ‘i-word’ she’ll know right away what you mean._ ”]

“[ _The i-word? You mean…_ ] ig... igrush... igrushka?” Other Papa finally says a word I know, and it’s that word! That's a good word. I jump up and grab a toy from my basket and bring it to him, and I drop it in his lap. Papa laughs and says something else I don’t understand, but it makes Other Papa smile. Other Papa plays with me for a little while, before he gets tired and gives up. I’m too strong for him. I always win.

We watch Santa on the Picture Box for a long time, and Papa falls asleep. Other Papa gets up and walks into the bedroom, and comes out with more boxes with yucky stuff wrapped around them. He’s being sneaky, so I don’t say anything. I’m a good girl.

He puts the boxes under the Pretend Tree and pats my head. Other Papa ties a little tree to the bright thing hanging from the roof, and smiles to himself.

“Be right back, Makkachin.” Other Papa has been getting really good at talking to me. I don’t say anything, because I’m a good girl, Papa is sleeping. I don't want to wake him up. He might be grouchy. I wait patiently by the Pretend Tree and Other Papa disappears again.

It’s a long time before I hear anything again. I almost fell asleep! I can’t fall asleep. Other Papa said he’d be right back. I have to watch Papa for him while he’s gone. 

I hear footsteps in the hallway, but it’s not Other Papa. It smells like him, but it doesn’t look like him. No, that’s definitely not Other Papa. But… who is it?

It’s Santa! He has fur on his face, and a big fluffy hat! Just like on the Picture Box! He walks into the room and I jump up and say hi, but I accidentally say hi too loudly. Papa wakes up, and he looks very grouchy.

“Papa! It’s Santa!” I say, jumping up to kiss Santa’s face. He smells just like Other Papa, but Santa isn’t wearing the shiny things on his face that Other Papa does. And Other Papa doesn’t have face fur. Papa sits up and smiles; he sees Santa and gets off the couch, obviously excited to meet Santa too.

He walks past me and gives Santa a big hug. 

[“ _Oh! Hello, Santa, it’s so nice to meet you!_ ”] Papa says, but I don’t understand him. He sounds happy, and he’s laughing. So I’m happy. But I still don’t know where Other Papa is. 

[“ _Hello young man!_ ”] Santa says. [“ _And what is your name?_ ”]

[“ _My name is Viktor._ ] And this is Makkachin!” Papa says and I say 'hi' in my best-behaved voice.

“Is Makkachin a good girl? Or a bad girl?” Santa asks me, and I know the answer. I’m a very good girl. Papa tells me all the time. 

“I’m a very good girl.” I reply politely, sitting very nicely. I have to play the part after all. Santa is a big deal. Though I don’t really know why. But that’s not important.

“Makkachin is a very good girl. I think she's on the ‘Nice List’, isn’t that right, Santa?” Papa says to Santa, who laughs big and happy like on the Picture Box.

“Very good! Makkachin want treat?” Santa asks me, and reaches into his pocket and pulls out a treat! A very yummy treat that smells like bacon!

“Yes!” I say, but I sit and wait, like a good girl. I need to make sure Santa knows I’m a good girl.

“Catch!” Santa says, and tosses the treat in the air. I jump up to catch it to show Papa the cool new trick that Other Papa taught me! But when I catch it and finish eating the very yummy treat, I see that Papa isn’t paying attention. In fact, Papa is… _KISSING SANTA!? Only Other Papa gets to kiss Papa!_

“NO! PAPA! STOP! That’s not Other Papa! STOP IT!” I yell, and I run at Papa and jump on him. We all fall down and I stand on Santa’s chest. “YOU CAN’T KISS PAPA, SANTA! HE’S NOT YOUR PERSON!” I yell some more, and I growl for good measure. Santa is trying to take Papa away from Other Papa. That’s not very nice. 

“Makkachin, down!” Papa yells, and I obey, his voice got loud and scary. “It’s Yuuri! It’s just Yuuri!” Papa says, and I watch Santa take off his fluffy hat and his face fur. It _is_ Other Papa! It was him the whole time!

“I’m sorry Papa!” I say. He gives me a big hug and pets me to help me calm down. “I’m sorry, I got scared. You were kissing Santa! And I didn’t know it was Other Papa. I’m sorry!” I say. 

“Heyheyhey Makkachin, shhshshshhh. It’s okay. Everything is okay now. It was just Yuuri.” Papa hugs me and I feel a little better, but Other Papa is still sitting on the floor, too far away for cuddles.

[“ _Yuuri, come snuggle with us._ ”] Papa says, waving Other Papa to come over. 

[“ _Vitya, you said this would be a good idea. Makkachin just attacked me._ ”] Other Papa says as he joins the cuddles, scratching my belly just right. Other Papa knows all the best belly scratch places.

[“ _I know. I thought it would go better. But you were too cute in that costume and beard not to kiss you. I'm blaming the mistletoe. I really thought we’d be fine. I didn’t think she would react like that. I just wanted her first Christmas to be special._ ”] They talk like this a lot, in their weird other way that I don’t understand. But I like the sounds of their voices. It makes me feel better. 

[“ _It’s definitely been… something, that’s for sure. Let’s just go to bed for the night, okay? It’s been a long day, birthday boy._ ”] 

“Ready for bed, sweetheart? I think you can cuddle with us for Christmas.” Papa says with a big smile.

“Yes! I like cuddles! What’s Christmas?” I ask, tilting my head to the side, the way Papa does. Other Papa stands up and picks up the hat and the face fur, and puts the hat on Papa’s head. 

[“ _Maybe you should be Santa next year. Grow out your beard for once. I bet it’d look nice._ ”] Other Papa says as he walks into the bedroom.

“What do you think, darling? Should I grow out my beard?” Papa asks me, but I don’t know what a beard is. I say 'yes' anyway. Because I’m a good girl. 

“Yeah. I think so too.” Papa says, petting his own face. Maybe he really _does_ know what I’m saying.

___________________

There are even more boxes under the Pretend Tree this morning. Shiny boxes, sparkly boxes, all different sizes and shades of gray. They’re very pretty.

Papa feeds me breakfast and he and Other Papa eat theirs, and we all open the boxes together. There are so many new toys for me to play with! And all the paper on the boxes is fun to roll around in.

[“ _I told you, Vitya, she likes the wrapping paper more than the toys._ ”] Other Papa says, tossing a brand new tennis ball to me, which I catch and bring back to him, before going back to the pile of shiny paper.

[“ _I’m sure she’ll forget all about it when you remind her of all the new toys we bought her, Yuuri. And I throw all the paper away._ ”] Papa says, whistling to get my attention. I look up and see the ball in his hand as he gives it to Other Papa. [“ _Okay love, say it. Try._ ”]

“Makkachin, want... the t-toy?” Other Papa says slowly and I yell 'yes'! Other Papa is getting really good at talking to me. It makes Papa very happy. “Go get it!” He says as he throws it all the down the hall. I take off running to go get it. I’m a very fast runner. I slide around the corner and go hunting. The ball rolled under the bed in the other room that no one uses anymore. Well, sometimes Angry Friend sleeps there.

When I come back to bring the ball to Other Papa, all the paper is gone, but all of my new toys are on the floor, just begging to be played with. But I’m tired. I had a very long night. So I pick up the purple toy that Papa left behind and lay down in front of the Warm Box with it. Papa and Other Papa watch the Picture Box and I fell asleep after a little while.

___________________

“Hey Viktor, what does she have in her mouth?”

“Oh my god. It’s the dildo.”

___________________

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this weird fic that started with a terrible joke my husband made to me while listening to Christmas music on the radio. I love Makkachin so much, but I much prefer writing in the human POV. lol. 
> 
> That said, I hope you enjoyed it! Drop a kudos if you liked, say hi in the comments! 
> 
> Thanks again for reading! And Merry Early Christmas!
> 
> ❤️ IA ❤️  
> [Tumblr](https://incandescentantelope.tumblr.com) | [ Twitter](https://twitter.com/IAtheAuthor)


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